Mick Karch was upset by my comments at the beginning.  It took him years to talk to me after this.  He even invoked the name Roger Kent to support his attack on me.  The matter of photographers and TV bothered me then, and bother me now. Why must the wrestling experience of the paying customer be shortchanged by a photographer standing in front of the ring blocking their view?  It's the asses in the seats that pay the bills, not the pictures, or the picture takers.  Friends of mine do this; I don't care.  Don't block my view!

Saint Paul Championship Wrestling

September 22, 2000

West Saint Paul Armory

Cris Dady opened the show and ordered the audience to mark out on cue for the TV cameras. I for one have grown tired of having to put over TV. I realize that part of being an announcer/MC is to get the crowd enthused about the card, why do I have to be enthusiastic for the sake of TV? At this level of wrestling, live performance is the thing. Any TV or video is very much of a bonus. The cameramen are always getting in my way too. I say this not to knock local wrestling on TV, I wish I could see more of it. Sometimes I feel like a trained seal barking and clapping whenever the red light comes on. Rant off. Ed Hellier came out and said something that no one could understand. It has been said before but bears repeating; the PA system at SPCW is wholly and utterly unintelligible. West Saint Paul Armory has very "live" acoustics. This can be a good thing. It can make a crowd of three hundred sound more like three thousand. It can also make the matter of amplification a very touchy thing.

Mortimer Plumtree then came out, leading Danny Dominion, "Sexy" Ace Steele, Colt Cabana, Deryck St. Holmes, and a valet I had never seem before. What followed was a TV interview that no one in the live, paying audience could understand.

(1) Len "Lawless" Walker (face) defeated Dan Jesser (heel) by submission. Referee Frank Stool got booed coming in. Jesser came into the ring and gave a heel rant none could understand. Perhaps he was telling everyone how busy his weekend was going to be. Len Walker came out with a badass babyface biker look of black leatherlooking pants, engineer's boots, and some monochrome tattoos He would have looked right at home at San Francisco's Folsom Street Fair. When the bell rang it sounded broken and a "This bell sucks" chant broke out. Just when I thought I would never see a win by submission ever again, Walker put Jesser into some sort of double arm lock and Dan gave up. Both men worked up a good sweat.

(2) Sexy "Ace" Steele (w/Mortimer Plumtree and The Unknown Ringslapper, heels) pinned Deryck St. Holmes, Esq. (w/ Mortimer Plumtree, heels) to win the Northern States Light Heavyweight Championship. Plumtree came out first and kicked Dady out of the ring. He talked for a long time. Deryck came out reluctantly, to put over the idea that he is the "odd man out" of the Chicago heels. Next, Ace came out with TUR, both wearing Mardi Gras masks. TUR has a tanned, made up, stripper look to her, and wore a short black dress. Plumtree had the pair shake hands at the start. From time to time during the match, Deryck would pause to consult his Book of Knowledge. There were lots of two counts during this one, really too many. Deryck sold a hurt leg. At one point, Ace got in a really good flying head scissors, and delivered several hard, loud, Flair chops. This was a really good match. It featured mat wrestling. This term "Old School" gets tossed around a lot, and I use it myself, but this was the real deal. This match would have fit right in at the Saint Paul Auditorium in 1972, right before Nick Bockwinkel fought Pepper Gomez. Ace got the pin after a top rope huracanrana (yes, I know that nothing is more "New School" than a top rope huracanrana, but this is what got him the pin). Some in the audience were restless during this one, but others, aware of the unique qualities of this match, applauded the heel win. The two shook hands afterwards, but Deryck was still suspicious of Plumtree.

(3) Tasty Travis Lee & Toni DeNucci (w/Alexis, heels) pinned Hellraiser Blood and Primetime (faces) to win the Northern States Tag Team Championship. Blood and Primetime were over with the crowd. The heels started out by stalling and working the crowd. DeNucci and Primetime went first. DeNucci dominated and gloated until PT came back with a flying shoulder block. When Blood and Travis Lee were in the ring, Lee flipped over the top rope onto the floor. As Blood knelt on his hands and knees, Primetime used his back as a springboard, went flying over the top rope, hit Lee and landed hard onto chairs, and looked injured. At this point the match stopped and the crowd became quiet. The wrestlers checked on Primetime and called for paramedics. As PT was helped to the back, the match resumed 2-on-1 with the heels having their way with Blood. Alexis came into the ring to hit him with a bronco buster. DeNucci connected with a Xena style corner to corner flip. After a time, Hellraiser Gutts came out in street clothes to serve as Blood's partner. For a long time the heels worked over Blood, and here the match lost tempo. Finally there was a hot tag, and Gutts took over and hit a sitout slam. Then Stool got bumped. The faces put a double team powerbomb on DeNucci and looked in command, when Gutts gave Blood a swinging neckbreaker, and pulled DeNucci on top of his former friend. Stool managed to count the pin. Then Gutts took the mike and ripped on Blood. All this set up a Blood vs. Gutts contest next time out. This was another good match.

(4) Danny Dominion (w/ Mortimer Plumtree & The Unknown Ringslapper, heels) pinned Rikki Noga (face) to win the Northern States Heavyweight Championship. TUR came out in a hot looking two piece outfit and wore a cool looking piece of navel jewelry. Noga gave the belt to Larry the Mark to hold during the match. This one had lots of high spots. The ring that SPCW is using now isn't very good. The ropes were especially soft and got in the way. I was expecting something to break at any time. A big early move was Noga flipping Dominion over the top rope, and followed up with a top rope dive. Dominion hit a facebuster and a big powerbomb, and confidently placed a boot and Noga's chest for a two count. After a Dominion drop kick which showed air, TUR hit the champ, and MP choked him with his ascot. Later Dominion and TUR connected with a doubleteam suplex. Next the wrestlers rested, trading sleeper holds. Noga got in a back drop and a flying body press, only to have Plumtree pull off referee Jay Soltis during the pin try. Then Noga climbed the ropes, only to be knocked off his feet with his crotch landing on the top turnbuckle by Dominion, who connected with a top rope superplex for the pin and the strap. Also a very good match.

After the intermission Mortimer Plumtree, Danny Dominion and TUR came out. Dominion said something and intro'd Ace Steele, who came out with a bottle of champagne and glasses. Morty rambled on, and eventually C. M. Punk came out and said something. Judging from his "straight edge " sweatshirt, I believe that he was reminding the heels of the advantages of leading a sober lifestyle. He also said something about Adam Pearce not being there, and that Ace had to wrestle instead. In any case, bedlam broke out, champagne was spilt, Punk was hit with Plumtree's cricket bat, and then Colt Cabana made a face turn when he came to Punk's aid, hitting a top rope clothesline on Dominion and Steele. Punk and Cabana eyed one another warily, and then shook hands. Colt climaxed his turn by hugging Larry the Mark.

(5) Colt Cabana (face) pinned Hellraiser Gutts (heel). Gutts wore his really cool looking all black getup. Blood was seen standing at the entrance to the locker room. Colt won after a top rope splash.

(6) C. M. Punk (face) pinned Adam Pearce (heel). Ace Steele came out first in street clothes and said something. Punk came out to a good pop. Steele's pants dropped during the fighting and exposed a big tear in the back of his underwear. For a time he wrestled with his pants down around his ankles. This was a funny bit. As Punk was going for a suplex, Adam Pearce came in and attacked Punk. In this match, the ring got in the way again. Punk tried to hit his move where runs up the ropes and then does a backflip off the top one, but the ropes were too loose, even at the turnbuckle, and Punk stumbled and fell. A small "you f'ed up" chant started, but it was half hearted as the crowd knew it wasn't his fault. Later Punk tried the move again, and it worked a little better. This was yet another good intense match. At the end Pearce tried a tombstone, but Punk slipped out of it and climbed (carefully) the ropes and connected with a moonsault. Pearce pulled a chain out of his boot and slugged Punk, but only got a two count. Then Punk rolled him up for the pin.

 This was a really good show. It had really good wrestling that made up for shortcomings from the PA and the shaky ring. Whether you like it or not, they are the best in town. –doc d'X